Bored.

Hi blog. I have noticed that days where I work at the high school are more difficult. It's quieter, the days seem to go slower and I am not close with the coworkers here. Makes for a long day. When it's quiet, my thoughts get going. This isn't healthy for me as it usually brings up negative thoughts/memories. I went to our loss group last week, and there was a new Mom who had lost her 9.5 mo old son. It was really difficult to hear. I might need to take a step back, as it brings loss and grief to the forefront of my mind. My therapist suggested it as well, but I got a little defensive as the group has been a big help for me. I need to be careful though to not surround myself with those fresh in their grief, as it makes me sad.

We've started moving stuff. My husband had his first emotional moment, thinking about the nursery. We looked at the new house and Caden's room will definitely need another coat of paint, so I am hoping that will help with the transition. We also have a winnie the pooh border to put up. I will still think of it as Ana and Caden's room. We already put one of her butterflies in the front garden.

I'm tired. Sure has been a lot of stress and change lately. Went home to Kennebunk this past weekend. It's always nice to see my family, but does make me miss my Mom. Things would be so much better if she were here. She was the head of the family, the planner. I miss that. It makes me very sad that she doesn't know Caden, but happy that she is with Ana.

I guess I should do some work. One foot in front of the other...